The Best Dunkers in the NBA

I love basketball. I have never been particularly athletic—I’ve always had to bust my butt to be any good at all. Because of this, I have always appreciated the beauty of a great dunk. Growing up I played dunk-ball a lot to try and pacify my feelings of physical inadequacy, but even then my ferocious dunks weren’t necessarily impressive (even though I thought I was pretty freaking awesome at the time). On the flipside, I have been dunked on several times, including once by Steve Young (yes, that Steve Young). I’ve got to admit it was pretty awesome. I was once dunked on so hard that I fell backward right into a wall about ten feet behind the tin. It was pretty embarrassing. I did actually dunk a ten foot hoop once–it was a follow-up dunk, but still, I put it down. I immediately called timeout so I could attempt to dunk again and failed miserably multiple times. Chalk the successful tip dunk up to adrenaline.
For some reason I felt it necessary to give that introduction. So, without further ado, here are the top five in-game dunkers in the NBA today with a bunch of awesome links (there are a bunch and some of the clips are long, but they're worth watching - some of the music is annoying, so you may want to hit mute). Keep in mind this is a list of current players only and does not include dunk contest dunks, but in-game situations only.

1. Vince Carter - Vince is the best dunker in NBA history. Period. His combination of acrobatics, power, and hangtime is stupid.Vince was amazing at UNC and took the NBA by storm - his highlights were on sportscenter every night. When playing for team USA the guy jumped over a 7-foot-2 guy for heaven’s sake! The thing that is so amazing about Vince is that he makes it look so easy—it just appears that he is messing around (and sometimes he is—he did quit on his team, after all). Even though many people don’t like him, he has to be the top dunker in the NBA. He’d be number one on my all-time list too.

2. Kobe Bryant - It’s pretty clear that I don’t always like Kobe, but the guy can throw it down like a champ.Kobe gets the nod at #2 because he dunks on everybody and has put down some of the most acrobatic dunks in NBA history. Sometimes it looks like Bryant decides what to do after he’s at the peak of his jump. One of the best dunks I have ever seen was when the Lakers were playing an exhibition game in Vegas a couple years ago and he absolutely bagged Ben Wallace. It was ridiculous. I jumped out of my seat like I had just won the lottery. Kobe has thrown down on some of the biggest guys in the league—his dunks on Yao (#2 on the clip) and Dwight Howard are among the best I've ever seen.

3. LeBron James - This guy is a freak. Has an NBA player ever been this athletically superior to everyone else?For a comparison as to how ridiculous he is, Karl Malone was 6' 9 and about 260 in his prime. Malone was generally considered to be in the best shape (or at least had the best physique) of anyone in the league. LeBron has similar measurables (6' 8, 245) at age 23. Adding LeBron’s athleticism to a frame like that is just unfair. Watch how he takes contact and still flushes with two hands. Ridiculous. I once heard Danny Ainge say that LeBron could show up to an NFL camp and make the team based solely on his athletic abilities. That's some high praise. LeBron's dunk on KG in the playoffs this year was amazing. LeBron dunks with power, but he takes the 3 spot here because I don't think he is as creative/flashy as Kobe.

4. Jason Richardson - If this list were for the best dunkers in a non-game situation Richardson might give Vince a run for the top spot.His off the glass under the leg dunk in the dunk contest was amazing. It actually gave me a rager (I need to credit PlayBoyd on the use of that term). Richardson makes it look pretty on breakaways but he's not as powerful as the guys ahead of him on this list.

5. Josh Smith - I don’t know that anyone in the NBA is more fun to watch than Smith.He can jump out of the gym, so every game you come away with a highlight dunk or a crazy rejection. He has made the Hawks fun to watch for the first time since Dominique left.

Just missed the cut (in no particular order): Dwight Howard, Andre Iguodala, Ricky Davis, Tyrus Thomas, Amare Stoudemire, Travis Outlaw

Quick Update -

Sorry about the little hiatus - Boyd became a daddy and I had some family medical issues to tend to over the past week and we didn't get a chance to get anything posted here, but we're back to the grind.
Someone commented that they are wondering where game two of the fantasy GM series is. I would like to know that also. I know that Boyd has run 4 of the games but he has yet to post the results. Boyd - anytime now, anytime.
As far as who will be getting the "we hate you" jockstrap, it appears that we have a tie - Bill Belichek and Barry Bonds tied for the most hated sports figure, each getting 20% of the vote. We will have to figure out a tie-breaker method or something to get a clear winner.
Speaking of hating people, I pretty much agree with what PlayBoyd wrote the other day about Brett Favre. I don't know that I have been so sick of hearing about one athlete in my entire life. Except for maybe Barry Bonds.
Well, that's the update for now. We will be getting some things up (that's what she said) here shortly, so keep coming back.

Impact Freshmen in College Football 2008

I was talking to a buddy of mine the other day and he was asking me who I thought would be this years Knowshon Moreno, i.e., who would be a breakout first-year player this season. He said that he thinks Moreno was the biggest breakout star last year. I disagreed, saying that I would go with Michael Crabtree but that Sam Bradford should be in the discussion too. He told me he’d be interested in the discussion, so here goes: my ideas as to who are the most likely first-year breakout stars of the 2008 college football season. I also decided to drop some ideas about the players I think will make huge strides in production from last year to this year.

Six freshmen who will make an impact (I looked almost exclusively at BCS schools):

Arthur Brown, LB, Miami – Brown was a big recruiting coup for the Canes. He had offers from every school in the country and most thought he would end up at LSU or USC. Brown will be a starter sooner rather than later. He arrived early for spring ball and has apparently been quite impressive (he led the team in tackles in the spring game, along with a pick and a forced fumble). He is super fast, can cover, and is a sure tackler. He fills gaps very quickly. In his highlight reels he is constantly in the backfield. He’ll be a force immediately. His brother (Bryce) is a top RB recruit who will join him at Miami next year.

Caleb King, RB, Georgia – King has been so good in practice that coaches have implemented new offensive sets in order to get King on the field with Knowshon Moreno. Offensive coordinator Mike Bobo has said that he wants at least 35 carries per game between Moreno and King. Word is that they want to use the duo the way Auburn used Cadillac Williams and Ronnie Brown. King is more of a power back than Moreno, but he is shifty as well.

Da’Quan Bowers, DE, Clemson – I read once that Bowers was the best defensive line recruit in the past five years. That’s pretty impressive stuff. He arrived early and began practicing with the Tigers in the spring. He and Ricky Sapp could develop into one of the best DE combinations in the country. Reports say that Bowers has gotten to this point (he was rated the top HS player in the country by some recruiting services) off of sheer athletic ability, so imagine what he can do as he gets proper instruction. Either way, Bowers is high energy and too good to keep off the field.

Darrell Scott, RB, Colorado – Scott rushed for over 3,000 yards and 45 touchdowns his junior season. Those numbers are crazy, especially in California where the competition is pretty stout. He’s a powerful runner with top-end speed (he ran a 4.32 40-yard dash at the scout combine last year). Most people thought Texas looked good to sign Scott, but Colorado nabbed him. Of course it didn’t hurt that Josh Smith, a Colorado WR, is Scott’s uncle. Scott has good hands and it will be interesting to see how Colorado gets him involved in the passing game.

Julio Jones, WR, Alabama – at 6-4 210, Jones has prototypical size for a wideout. If you’ve seen his highlight film, you know that he catches everything that comes his way and is great after the catch. Scouts Inc. compares Jones to a high school version of Michael Irvin, but “more explosive and faster.” His three-year high school stats are: 3,287 receiving yards and 52 total touchdowns. That’s great production on that level and he should pay immediate dividends for Nick Saban.

Patrick Johnson, CB, LSU – The only “weak” link on the LSU defense, if you can call it weak, is cornerback play. Because of this, Johnson will have the chance to come in and play immediately. At 6-1 he’ll be able to match up with some of the SEC’s bigger receivers. Johnson is very fast and plays physical. He also played running back in high school and Les Miles has flirted with the idea of using Johnson as a return man also. Johnson originally committed to Miami, but LSU swooped in and landed the nation’s top-rated corner.

Six more to keep an eye on: Marcus Forston, DT, Miami; Omar Hunter, DT, Florida; A.J. Green, WR, Georgia; Nigel Bradham, LB, Florida State; Kavario Middleton, TE, Washington; Simi Kuli, DE, Oregon State.

Six players who will make the jump from solid to standout:

Everson Griffen, DE, USC – Griffen is crazy good. I really think that by the end of the season he might be the best player on USC’s defense other than Maualuga. Griffen has that kind of potential. He played end and running back in high school, so he has great speed for a defensive lineman. As loaded as USC was on the d-line last year, they couldn’t keep Griffen off the field. He had 5.5 sacks last season as he was named freshman All-America as a reserve. He’s going to explode this year.

Allen Bailey, DE, Miami – Bailey is as athletic a defensive end as you will find in college football. He was moved to end from linebacker and will bring tremendous speed to the Miami defense. Bailey plays with aggression and is a punishing tackler. As he continues to adjust to playing with his hand on the ground, expect him to develop into one of the best ends in the country.

Carlos Dunlap, DE, Florida – While I don’t think he is as good as Griffen, Dunlap should have a breakout season. The Gators need someone to replace the production of Derrick Harvey on the edge and Carlos appears to be capable. A part of Urban’s insane defensive line recruiting effort two years ago, Dunlap appears to be the only one of the bunch truly ready to contribute. This is evidenced by the fact that he had 4 sacks in the spring game.

Joe McKnight, RB, USC – McKnight was rated as the #1 running back in his high school class and started to show flashes of brilliance toward the end of last season. Steve Sarkesian has said that he wants to use McKnight similarly to the way Norm Chow utilized Reggie Bush—get him the ball often and however you can. McKnight will begin the season as the second string running back but will get plenty of touches. He is also likely to return punts.

Omar Bolden, CB, Arizona State – Bolden is fast and has great instincts. He started last year as a true freshman and could be one of the ten or fifteen best corners in the nation by the time the season is over. Dennis Erickson says that Bolden is the most intense player on the team, a good quality to have in a cover corner. Bolden will develop into a shutdown corner this season.

Brian Price, DT, UCLA – Price missed the beginning of last season due to NCAA clearinghouse issues, but was solid when he saw the field. He had 7 tackles for loss in 5 starts. Defensive coordinator DeWayne Walker says that Price has been dominant in the spring and he is expected to develop into an All-American. Price has surprising quickness for a defensive tackle – it almost seems like you’re watching an outside linebacker.

Six more to keep an eye on: Martez Wilson, LB, Illinois; Marvin Austin, DT, North Carolina; Kodi Burns, Auburn; Deunta Williams, S, North Carolina; Jimmy Clausen, QB, Notre Dame, Donovan Warren, CB, Michigan.

Whom in Sports Do You Hate the Most?

I'm in a bit of a foul mood today - I've been stressed out lately, I've spent all day in a conference where the AC was broken, at said conference I sat behind a hefty lady in a thong, and Brett Favre is all they seem to want to talk about on the radio. It gets old. Seriously, do we have to go through the "will he retire" or "will he play" thing with Brett every year? Please Brett, just pull on your skin-tight Wranglers and hop on your John Deere to mow your giant lawn without having to alert the press. I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired of it. I have always liked and respected Favre, but I'm just done with his need to be the focus of attention.

Speaking of attention, the athletes I like the least are generally the ones who do whatever they can to get attention. A-Rod opting out of his contract during the World Series. Favre - just go away. Terrell Owens doing sit-ups in his driveway and calling Jeff Garcia gay. Great. Then you have the guys who are just wangers. Randy Moss and the meter maid. Barry Bonds and his giant head. The least you could do when you break Hank Aaron's record is hug your son, Barry. Did you see his son go up to him for a hug at home plate during one of the biggest moments in baseball history only to get snubbed? An A-hole first and a dad second. Those are just some obvious ones. Some guys are pricks on a smaller scale. You know who is a total schmuck? Philip Rivers (see also Boyd's previous mention of those who go by Philip instead of Phil; case in point). So, this led to a conversation between Boyd and me. Whom in sports do we hate the most? We came up with some selections and decided to take a poll: Whom do you hate the most? We decided to keep this within the three major sports: baseball, football, and hoops. We don't do hockey on this page. I'm listing some of the obvious ones from each sport, but feel free to chime in with comments under this post if you think we've left someone off. We want write-in candidates because, frankly, there are so many to choose from.

In the interest of making this poll as entertaining as possible, Boyd and I will attempt to contact the agent of the winner to let them know that their client is the champion of our poll in a colorful and entertaining way (maybe along the lines of a 1980s Ric Flair promo. Whooooo!). That or we'll send them a jockstrap with our thoughts on it. Whether we receive a reply or some automated no-reply message (I'm guessing we won't get a response, considering this is a poll for the biggest schmuck in sports) we will publish it here. Just for entertainment purposes. So vote!

College Football’s Best Games - 2008

In all my excitement for the upcoming season (and the fact that NCAA Football 09 comes out today) and my being so sick and freaking tired of the Brett Favre saga (thank you Boyd for adding to that), I’ve been looking at schedules to see what the best games of the college football season should be. These are the games I am most looking forward to this year and that will likely play some kind of role in determining who will be in the BCS games at the end of the year. If you think I’ve left some out (yes, I left Ohio State-Michigan and Texas-Oklahoma out on purpose), let me know why.

Ohio State at USC (September 13)
This is the most intriguing matchup of the season. The winner of this game has a great chance to get to the title game because the Pac 10 and Big 10 are both a bit weak this year. The Ohio State and USC may have the two best defenses in the country. How will OSU’s line hold up against USC’s defensive pressure? Will either team be able to throw the ball? Is the best linebacker in the game Laurinaitis, Maualuga, or Cushing? Can Wells put up big yards against Pete Carroll’s vaunted defense? If OSU can pull this off, get used to the idea of seeing the Buckeyes getting a third opportunity to make a mockery of the BCS title game. Just because OSU was beaten soundly in the past two title games doesn’t mean they don’t have the talent to win in the Coliseum—they do and they will.

Georgia at Arizona State (Septemer 20)
UGA hasn’t traveled west of the Mississippi for a road game in about 20 years and Arizona State didn’t play anyone out of conference last year, so this one is a bit unexpected. Everyone is on Georgia’s, um, jockstrap this year. They are #1 in most of the polls I’ve seen, but they have what has to be the toughest schedule in the nation. Winning on the road at Arizona State could jumpstart them to an amazing run. Georgia’s defensive line should really disrupt the ASU offense because their O-line sucks. Georgia will probably win this game and it should be a fun one to watch.

Auburn at West Virginia (October 23)
This is a tough home game for West Virginia. The Mountaineers struggle against teams with great speed on defense (i.e., South Florida and Pittsburgh), so Auburn will be tough. This game will be dangerous for WV because Auburn will have had half the season to fine-tune their new spread offense. If Auburn has figured out how to run the offense effectively by this point West Virginia might go down. I can't stress this enough: watch West Virginia this year. Noel Devine is amazing.

Illinois vs. Missouri (August 30)
Last year’s game was super exciting (40-34 Mizzou) and no one expected these teams to end up with a combined 20-5 regular season record. This year everyone will be expecting big things from both teams. Missouri will be out to prove that they should have been in a BCS bowl last year by beating the team who got trounced in the Rose Bowl. Illinois has great speed on defense and may prove to be a difficult test for Chase Daniel and company. Two of the best sophomore receivers in the country will be on display in this game. A win here could propel both teams to big seasons.

Kansas at South Florida (September 12)
Two teams that practically came out of nowhere last year to impact the national scene play in this interesting non-conference game. But is it really interesting? Do people generally give a crap about either of these teams? Who would have thought this game would mean anything before last season? Kansas has always sucked and USF has never done much, but both teams were ranked #2 at one point last year. If nothing else, you’ve got to love Mangino. He seriously looks like a walrus minus the tusks, and you can find him cussing people out on youtube. College football at its best.

BYU at Utah (November 22)
These are the two best non-BCS teams in the country bar none, and I don’t want to hear that crap about Fresno State. Utah vs. BYU has been as exciting as any rivalry in recent years. The past three games have been classics, with Utah winning in OT, BYU winning on an amazing last play, and BYU converting a 4^th and 18 with about a minute left to win last year. BYU plays Washington and UCLA out of conference and Utah plays Michigan (Utah will pull off that upset!) and Oregon State. It is conceivable that one (or even both) of these teams could be undefeated going into this game, and there is nothing that these rivals would like more than to keep the other out of a BCS game.

LSU-Florida-Georgia
These teams could knock each other out of contention for the national championship. Of course, if you’re in the SEC you can apparently lose 2 games and still get into the BCS title game. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Florida lost to LSU and Georgia last year, while UGA-LSU didn’t happen. It’s a shame because they may have been the two best teams in the country (Ohio State certainly wasn’t one of them).

Georgia at LSU (October 25)
This game should have happened last year. When Georgia fully got it together toward the end of the season they seemed almost unbeatable. These teams finished 1-2 in the polls last year. Georgia appears to be the more complete team, but if LSU gets good quarterback play the talent level is crazy.

Georgia vs. Florida (November 1)
The world’s largest outdoor Cocktail Party. What a great name for the game. If I could go to any game I want to this season, this is the one. Urban Meyer will probably have his guys pissing on Georgia logos for weeks before the game after what happened after Georgia’s first score last year. Urban can motivate as well as any coach in college football, so the Dawgs better be ready.

LSU at Florida (October 11)
Another revenge game for the Gators. LSU didn’t lead in last year’s game until just over a minute left to play. Florida should have won and they know it. How will Urban fire his guys up this time? LSU toilet paper? Miles and Meyer are two of the most outspoken coaches in college football. Miles saying that USC has it tough because they have to play such juggernauts as Stanford is classic.

Why I Love/Hate Kobe Bryant

I grew up a Lakers fan. My dad was a Lakers fan, and it was passed on to me. I watched the great Lakers teams of the 80s. Growing up I had posters of Magic, Worthy, Scott, Cooper, etc., in my bedroom. When I played ball I even used to wear socks to my knee because of my love for Cooper and a wrist band at my elbow in honor of Scott (though I didn’t go so far as to sport the goggles of Worthy and Jabbar). I even remember Jeff Lamp. Nothing made me happier than watching L.A. beat the Celtics, Pistons, or Jazz. I stayed true through the mostly down years of the 90s. I suffered through the years of Jones, Threatt, Campbell, Ceballos and Peeler, while watching teams like Seattle and Portland get to The Finals. It sucked. Then things changed—the Lakers got Shaq and Kobe. They won titles and were again the glamour franchise in the NBA. Things were back to normal, things were good—until one man made me question my fandom. Kobe Bryant.

I hate Kobe Bryant. Not in the sense that I hate him, but in the sense that I hate certain TV or book characters; they aren’t real, so I can hate them. Bryant isn’t real to me. Kobe has single-handedly changed my love for the Los Angeles Lakers, and it has nothing to do with the whole Colorado rape case thing (it is amazing that he bought his wife a 4-million-dollar ring to help ease the pain). I used to be die-hard about being a Lakers fan, and now I can’t even cheer for them. I don’t like Gasol, Vujabic, Radmonovic, Walton, or anyone else on the team. But it all goes back to Kobe.

I try to like KB8/KB24, but I just can’t do it. I respect his ridiculous skills—I think he’s clearly the best player in the NBA (even though PlayBoyd would argue with me), but he has always carried himself like he was the best player in the league even before he accomplished anything in the NBA. He has this annoying sense of entitlement. He always looks so smug. In the 1998 All-Star game (Michael Jordan’s last before his Wizards comeback) Kobe busted his butt to outplay MJ in what seemed like an effort to symbolize a “passing of the torch.” Come on. Not that playing hard against MJ or in an All-Star game is inherently wrong, but it irritated me. Kobe didn’t even deserve to be in the All-Star game that year; he only started one game that season. But he had something to prove. There he was, a bench player, trying to one-up MJ, because it’s all about Kobe.

At times I like Kobe. In the 1997 playoffs the Lakers lost to the Jazz. In a deciding game 5, Kobe hoisted four air-balls in the closing minutes of the game. He was taunted mercilessly by Jazz fans. He doubled his scoring average the next year, citing the humiliation in Utah as part of his motivation. He has since become the best clutch performer in the league. The 2002 All-Star game was in Philadelphia, Kobe’s “hometown.” Philly fans don’t like that Kobe claims it as his hometown and they booed him incessantly throughout the game. Kobe responded by going for 31-5-5 in 30 minutes and won the MVP award. It made me want to love him again, the way that he responded to criticism and the hostile crowd.

My dislike reemerged in the 2004 NBA Finals when the Lakers lost to the Pistons. In the series Kobe took 29 more shots than Shaq, while Shaq shot 63% from the field to Kobe’s 38%. Shaq averaged 4 points more per game than Kobe on 6 less shots per game. Nice work Kobe. Way to take the best player on the court out of the game. That crap was hard to watch as a Lakers fan. That offseason he used the Clippers (what up Clipper fan) offering him a contract as leverage to run Phil and Shaq out of town. It was exactly what Kobe wanted. The Lakers became Kobe’s team and he was out to prove his greatness. At times he did—getting Dwight Howard up close and personal, averaging over 35 ppg one year, 43 ppg in one month, and scoring 81 points in a game. Those numbers are amazing. He became the first player in NBA history to outscore an opposing team through 3 quarters—Kobe 62, Dallas 61. Wilt Chamberlain thinks that’s stupid. But with Kobe scoring at a ridiculous clip the Lakers didn’t win.

Speaking of playoffs, in typical Kobe fashion, proving his point (or greatness) has always been more important than winning. In a 2004 playoff series against the Kings he decided not to shoot after being criticized for shooting too much. L.A. lost that game. In the 2006 playoffs against the Suns, Kobe decided he would only shoot the ball 3 times in the second half, even with the Suns up by 15 at halftime. Why? To prove that his teammates are not reliable and that they need Kobe to drop 35 to have a chance of winning? Way to put the team first Kobe. Point taken—you are more important than winning. You truly are MJ’s heir apparent. . .

Have you ever watched Kobe give credit to others? It looks so unnatural to him. When asked about another player he seems to get this look on his face (probably wondering how Jordan would answer the question) like, “why aren’t we talking about me?” Kobe seems to overemphasize injuries. Whenever he remotely twists his ankle, watch him hobble up and down the court—especially after a miss—as if he were running on a wooden leg. But when he has the ball he’s surprisingly fluid, breaking people’s ankles and throwing down monster dunks. He seems to over-dramatize every gesture. It’s like he scans his brain to decide what Jordan would do (likely trying to remember what he read in The Jordan Rules), and then he tries to perform the action as naturally as possible. Oh, but he also plays the tough guy. When an opponent gets physical with him he hits a shot and then gives that menacing Kobe Bryant stare to the other team. Okay, tough guy. We get it. Your will to win is unmatched. Or, that is, your will to be the best. Individually, at least.

People keep saying: “Kobe has grown up this year. He’s learning to trust his teammates, and he gets them more involved.” Awesome. Let’s give him an effin’ cookie. It’s about time Kobe. You’ve been in the league for 12 years; we’re all really impressed that you finally put it together. We’re all patting you on the back that it took you forever to understand the common fundamentals of basketball 101—it’s a team game.

This year during the Finals the media kept mentioning that Kobe suffered through the last few years of futility and is now seeing it pay off. How about Paul Pierce? He really suffered through futile years with his franchise. Did he piss and moan about his supporting cast being terrible? Did he decide to stop passing to teammates to prove that they can’t do it without him? Did he demand a trade because the rest of his team sucked? No. That’s what made it that much sweeter for this Lakers fan to see Pierce hoist that Finals MVP trophy in the air. After all, he was the one who deserved it. I never thought I’d see the day where I’d cheer for the Celtics to beat the Lakers. It makes me a little bit sick because I’ve always been a Lakers fan, but I just don’t have the energy anymore.

The NFL's best Quarterbacks circa Right Now

When I sat down to do this, I thought it would be pretty easy. It wasn't. I think the top 2 quarterbacks in the NFL are well above everyone else, but after that it gets a bit dicey. There really are only 2 great quarterbacks in the league. I don't even know that anyone else would qualify as "really good." Deciding on 3 through 5 was tough because no one seems to definitively separate themselves from anyone else. The quarterbacks from the draft class of 2004 - Rivers, Roethlisberger, and Eli Manning - is not as great as most people seem to think, but they all might be in the top 10 in the league. That's how weak quarterback play in the NFL is right now. So, without further delay, here is the stone cold top 5:

1.a. Payton Manning

1.b. Tom Brady

Now this is the real debate. Both of these guys are sure-fire Hall of Famers and top 10 of all-time. This is as close as it gets, but I give a slight edge to Manning. Most people would probably pick Brady here, but most people would be wrong. Brady has Payton beat in several categories: the ladies, Super Bowl rings, arm strength, pocket presence, and overall sex appeal (the picture shows just how gorgeous he is - look at his chest). I'd still take Manning if I were a coach/GM. Brady is often amazing in the clutch, but his legend as a clutch performer is slowly eroding. And as for last seasons statistics, let us not underestimate the Randy Moss factor. Brady put up huge numbers last year, but how many times was he bailed out by throwing some 50 yard alley-oop to Moss? Not that there's anything wrong with that - it's smart football. If I had Moss on my team that's what I would tell my QB to do. The argument then goes to the supporting cast. Whose is better? Manning has usually had better recievers and running backs, while Brady has generally had superior o-lines, defenses, and coaches. I would say Brady has generally had the better supporting cast, as evidenced by his 3 rings. And for the record, football is a team sport and championships should not necessarily be the tie-breaker (they can be, but shouldn't be the be-all end-all). Put Brady or Manning on the Raiders and neither would go to the big game, let alone the playoffs. Still, quarterback is the most important position in football, and maybe in all of sports.

Let's look at the stats: Manning has a higher career quarterback rating. As amazing as Brady's QB rating was last year (117.2), it wasn't as good as Payton's best season (121.1). Brady has had a quarterback rating over 93 one time in his career - last season. Manning has been over 93 six times. It's about consistency, folks, and Manning has it. Manning has won more league MVPs 2-1. Manning has a higher career completion percentage. Watch defenses scramble as Manning sets up the offense - he's more cerebral (I just wanted to find a way to get that word in here somewhere) than any other QB in football. His preparation is crazy. Belichek-like, even. Anyway, Manning is the pick here for me. He is also durable - he has started 160 consecutive games.

With all that said, the off the field argument is fun also. Brady is as boring as anyone (except when that lady asked him to marry her at the Super Bowl last year. That was awesome). Manning is a bit vanilla also, but can be surprisingly funny. His commercials are good (not the Oreo ones) and his guest-host appearance on Saturday Night Live was awesome. But he can't touch Brady when it comes to the ladies. Payton's wife is very pretty, but Brady is currently dating Gisele Bundchen. He has also been linked to Bridget Moynahan. Manning just can't compete with that.

3. Drew Brees - I went with Brees over Palmer at 3 for a few reasons. For one, Brees looks like a champ when he's working out. In addition, Brees has outplayed Palmer now for three straight years. Brees has less offensive talent around him and he does more with that talent. Last season he threw for more yards, more touchdowns, less interceptions, and had a higher passer rating than Palmer. Brees doesn't exactly have Chad Johnson and TJ Houshmanzendejas to throw to either. Brees doesn't have the physical tools or the supporting cast that Palmer has but Brees still puts up superior numbers. Brees also seems to be a better leader.

4. Carson Palmer - Palmer has all the physical tools to be in the upper echelon with Brady and Manning. He has some of the best and most insane receivers (see right) in the league to throw to. If only he got more help from the line. Carson has an amazingly strong arm but can put some nice touch on his throws too. It's kind of weird to think about, but seeing Palmer as my 4th rated QB in the NFL is a disappointment. He should be 3 and maybe in the discussion at number 1, but he hasn't put it all together. Palmer is developing impressive facial hair though, and that is becoming more and more important as I evaluate and discuss sports. (as a side note, Boyd has a pretty amazing beard)

5. Tony Romo - Now, I'm not a Romosexual mind you, but I am impressed with this guy. He seems to have the it factor. I reiterate - not a Romosexual. It's not something I can necessarily put my finger on, but he passes the eye-ball test. He has all the tools to be great in the NFL. He reads defenses well, is accurate, has a cannon, and has impressive pocket presence. He still throws too many interceptions, but I think he'll remedy that as he gets more experience. Maybe all the picks is why people compare him to Favre... If Romo had produced on the field for a longer period of time I might have him a little higher. Also, he has yet to win playoff game with a stacked team. If this list were about the women you date, he'd be number 2 behind Brady. My goodness, Jessica Simpson and Carrie Underwood? Um, nice work Tony. The fact that he'd be number 2 on the women dated list shows how amazing Tom Brady's bachelorhood is.

Underrated: Jason Campbell, Matt Hasselbeck, Matt Schaub.

Overrated: Vince Young, Vince Young, Vince Young. This guy is so overhyped it's crazy. I actually read an article in SI before last season that said he was the most feared offensive player in football. That is the most blasphemous thing I have ever heard. It still makes me sick.

Could break out: Alex Smith, Jay Cutler.

Will never live up to the hype: Michael Freaking Vick.

The Top 10 College Football Teams of 2008-2009

I have a few obsessions: my wife, reading, lists, and college football. I can't get enough of the college game. I think it makes my wife a bit crazy, but I can't help it. It must be genetic. At this time of year I can't get enough preseason polls and analysis. I read every website and magazine I can find. There are probably better ways of spending my time, but I haven't found any yet. So, in honor of those preseason polls, here is my Top 10 for the upcoming college football season. I ranked them based on where I expect them to be in the final top 10 of the year, not the 10 best teams. If you agree/disagree, let me hear it.

1. Oklahoma - Three important keys to winning championships are good offensive and defensive line play, and good quarterback play. The lines win games in college football, and Oklahoma has two of the best in the country. The O-line returns four starters and plenty of NFL talent. Add to this Sam Bradford (the nations top-rated passer last year), DeMarco Murray (6 ypc), Juaquin Iglesias, and Jermaine Gresham, and you have an explosive offense (over 42ppg last year). The D-line is awesome. Auston English is one of the best ends in the country, and in McCoy and Granger the Sooners have two run-stuffing tackles. The secondary will be strong; the main question with this team is the linebackers. OU always has athletes, so I expect them to be fine. The schedule isn't too tough, with Texas and Kansas the toughest games. If OU can again beat Missouri in the Big 12 title game, expect them in the BCS title game.

2. Ohio State - I'm pretty sick of the Buckeyes, but once again Ohio State is loaded. Pardon me, The Ohio State University. Arrogant pricks. The game of the year happens on Sep. 13 when OSU goes to USC. If the Buckeyes can get through that one, the coast is relatively clear to a third straight BCS title game. No one in the Big 10 is close. The only hiccups might be at Wisconsin and Illinois, but Ohio State should win both. The only potential soft spot on the roster is the o-line, which was dominated by LSU last year. In spite of that line and some nagging injuries, Chris Wells ran for over 1,600 yards last year. He will be a monster this year and is my pick to win the Heisman. It will be interesting to see if USC pressures Boeckman the way LSU did in the title game last year and how the Buckeyes respond. Right now, I'm going with Ohio State to win that game and get to a third straight BCS title game. Of course, with their performance the past two year in the title game, the voters might not want to see them there again. I know I don't.


3. Florida - Florida could have the best offense in the country. They are flat-out loaded with Tebow, Harvin, and a very good line. Even though Harvin gets a decent amount of pub, he still might be underrated. He is dynamic with the ball and Meyer uses him in a variety of ways. The big question is defense, where they gave up over 25 ppg last year. They return 7 starters on D, but is that a good thing? The potential on defense is insane due to Urban Meyer's great recruiting, but that potential didn't show through last year, so why this year? The linebackers are solid, led by Brandon Spikes. The secondary needs work after the defense ranked 98th in passing yards per game. The defense is a work in progress. As good as the offense is, they still need to find a reliable tailback. Chris Rainey, who was tremendous in the spring game, or Emmanuel Moody (a USC transfer) could be the answer. Even with questions at tailback, the offense will outscore teams in most games, but because of shaky defense they're bound to slip up somewhere.


4. Georgia - I've seen UGA picked as the #1 team in the country in most polls. Why? Outside of Knowshon Moreno, is there an All-American on this team? Geno Atkins? Maybe. Rennie Curran? In the future, probably. Matthew Stafford? I'm going to go ahead and say no. I just don't see Georgia winning the title. Maybe if they wear their black uniforms in every game. Those uni's are awesome. I don't know that Matthew Stafford is capable of leading a team to the title. He might be. Just because he was highly recruited doesn't make him great. Mark Richt is a tremendous coach - one of the 5 best in the nation - and the team does have talent all over the field, but the schedule is too tough. They go to S. Carolina, Arizona State, Auburn, and LSU, play Florida on a "neutral" field in the state of Florida, and have Tennessee, Georgia Tech, and Alabama at home. If Georgia can win all those games, the SEC title game, and the BCS title game, they should be in the discussion for the team of the decade. I don't see it happening. I actually like them better than Florida and the Ohio State, but due to the schedule I have Georgia finishing below them.


5. USC - As always, USC will be in the national title hunt. I can't pick them in the top 2 or 3 after losing to Stanford last year. Someone can just creep up on them again. The Trojans will break in a new starting quarterback (Sanchez started a few games last year when Booty was injured) and have an underachieving set of receivers who haven't lived up to their recruiting hype. USC has a solid O-line and a good group of running backs. Joe McKnight and Stafon Johnson could have huge seasons. The defense will be awesome this year. USC and Ohio State should have the best defenses in the country. Their LBs are easily the best in the country, the secondary is stout, and the D-line has studs everywhere. If you haven't heard of Everson Griffen, you will. He will have a breakout season as he takes over a starting role at end. The defense is chalked full of NFL players. I like USC to get into the BCS Championship game against Oklahoma if the Trojans can knock off the Buckeyes early on. Oh, by the way, FB Stanley Havili is severely overlooked. His versatility is ridiculous. I'm also excited to see Pete Carroll vs. Rick Neuheisel this year. I think Neuheisel's money is on SC.


6. Missouri - I never thought I'd see Missouri in the top ten, let alone ranked #1 in the country like they were at one point last year. The offense gets a lot of hype here, but the defense deserves some credit. The Tigers have a good group of linebackers and one of the best safeties in the country in William Moore. Missouri had a great turnover margin last year (+14) and it should continue this season. The offense is stacked with Chase Daniel, Jeremy Maclin, and Chase Coffman being among the best in the country at their respective positions. Missouri has some tough games against Illinois, Texas, and Kansas, as well as a likely matchup against Oklahoma in the Big 12 title game. I was tempted to put Missouri higher than this, but the talent above them is just too much.


7. LSU - It's tough for me to put the Tigers at 7 because they have such good lines on both sides of the ball. I'm a firm believer that the lines win games in football, so why is LSU so low with such talent on both lines? First, the QB situation. Ryan Perrilloux was dismissed from the team a few months ago. They'd be higher on this list with him under center. Second, the corners are unproven. If LSU is to beat Auburn and Florida the corners better get up to speed in a hurry. Third, they play in the SEC. LSU plays at Auburn, South Carolina, and Florida and has Georgia at home. If the quarterback play is good and the corners learn quickly, LSU could end up much higher than #7. With Les Miles as coach and their recent recruiting hauls, they certainly have the talent to do so.

8. Clemson - Clemson could screw up my entire rankings. This team could go either way - completely underachieve (as usual) or break out and make the BCS title game. If they can shore up the offensive line, Clemson could be the best team in the country. They are ridiculously talented at the skill positions, with QB Cullen Harper, RBs C.J. Spiller and James Davis, and WR Aaron Kelly. Now if only the line can protect Harper and open holes for the backs. The Tigers gave up 35 sacks last year and Davis averaged a career-low 5 ypc (believe me, it was the fault of the line, not Davis). The line also gave up 8 sacks in the spring game - 8! Part of that is that Clemson has a very good defensive front, but 8 sacks in a spring game is cause for worry. Clemson's defense should be good in the front and back, with the linebackers the questionmark. The secondary is one of the best in the country and the D-line has two young ends who could be dominant in Sapp and Bowers. Clemson is a bit of an enigma to me - I could rank them anywhere from 3-15. I settled on somewhere in the middle. Tommy Bowden just has a knack for the big letdown.

9. West Virginia - The Mountaineers have built a mini-dynasty in Morgantown - they have finished in the top 10 each of the past 3 seasons. The offense will again be special. Pat White is a great runner and an improving passer and Noel Devine is the most exciting player in America. His lateral movement is amazing. He averaged 8.6 yards a carry and is tough for his size. The offensive line returns in-tact and should again pave the way for White and Devine to put up huge numbers. The WV defense was overlooked last year. I'm not sure how, considering they finished #7 in the country. They only return 4 starters on defense, but the scheme is solid. WV has tougher non-conference games this year at Colorado and at home against Auburn. If you get the chance to watch the Mountaineers play this year, do it. Devine and White are as fun to watch as anyone in college football.

10. Auburn - Auburn will have one of the best defenses in the country this year. They finished 6th in total D last year and return most of the starters. The defense should have more overall speed, which will be necessary against LSU, West Virginia, and Georgia. Fortunately, the Tigers don't have to play Florida this year unless they meet in the SEC title game. Auburn should be improved after having time to implement the spread offense this offseason. They installed the spread in 9 practices before the Chik-fil-A Mastercard Goodyear Circuit City Mineke Bowl last year, where they racked up a season-high 423 yards against Clemson. If Kodi Burns improves his accuracy he could be a great dual-threat quarterback in this offense. The receivers are underrated and the offensive line is always good.

5 Teams Under the Radar (not in the National Title hunt, but will surprise this year): Oklahoma State, North Carolina, Oregon State, Ole Miss, Pittsburgh.

5 Teams that are Overhyped (teams that are ranked higher than they should be in most preseason polls): Virginia Tech, Texas, Wisconsin, Alabama, Arizona State.

Most likely BCS-busters: 1. BYU 2. Utah 3. Fresno State 4. Boise State 5. TCU

The Ugliest Players in the League - NBA version

There are some ugly cats in the NBA. Seeing Pau Gasol in the NBA Finals compelled several discussions about the good, the bad, and the ugly between me and some friends, so (of course) I decided I better make a list of the best of the worst. As I was putting together this list of the ugliest NBA players I thought of several ways to do it: Ugliest at each position, a general top 10, etc. My wife has a theory that the taller you are, the uglier you are likely to be. Based on this theory I decided on a general list of six in order to not limit the talent pool. This list is in no particular order; also included are some who just barely missed the cut. If I left any deserving players off the list, please feel free to correct me.

Sam Cassell - My goodness. Has a more strange looking player ever graced an NBA court? This
guy is a cross between predator and an alien. Maybe he looks like Gollum. His skull looks like it could burst at any moment or like something might emerge out of it. Looking at Cassell kind of reminds me of Mortal Kombat and doing a fatality - Cassell looks like his cranium could spontaneously combust at any moment. Plus his teeth are huge. And yellow. Oh, and you could fit a roll of quarters in each one of his nostrils. It's just down right disturbing.

Robert Swift - Maybe you don't know who he is because he never seems to get playing time and he plays for a team that sucks. But you should know him because he is tremendous looking. From the amazing chin carpet to the pony-tail/hair curtain in the back, he is an Adonis among men. Keep in mind that he is still young and has the potential to actually become more hideous with time.

Hedo Turkoglu - I remember watching a game back in the day when Hedo was in Sacramento and the Kings were actually good. Danny Ainge was doing commentary and after they showed a close-up of Hedo, Ainge said: "Wow! Look at the beak on that guy!" He and the other announcers were laughing so hard they couldn't even talk. Hedo looks like he is on some type of sedative at all times. I realize that when you play ball you exert yourself and breathe harder than normal (i.e., with your mouth open), but Hedo sits there with his yap open at all times - when he's warming up, on the sidelines, during interviews. Someone needs to find a way to install a chinstrap for this guy.

Pau Gasol - If his curly hair and bad beard weren't enough, the fact that I absolutely can't stand him is. Every time he gets the ball one of three things happens: he scores and gets an And-1, causing him to pound his chest like a maniac; he scores and complains to the refs the whole way down the court that it should have been an And-1; or he doesn't score and he pisses and whines like a baby. It gets old. The fact that he is so ugly only makes it worse. Oh, and in this years NBA Finals he added a fourth option to his post repertoire: getting owned by KG. And getting owned by KG's facial hair.

Scot Pollard - I know Boyd said Baron Davis has the best beard in the NBA, but I might give my vote to Pollard. He can even rock whatever that is on his chin in this picture. That is amazing stuff, especially in combination with a blonde Mohawk. He also has some impressive mutton chops (at times). You never know what you'll get from Pollard. The guy is insane, by the way. He always paints his fingernails black and, for a while, he drove a VW bus that was spray painted with graffiti even though he was pulling in an NBA paycheck. Best of all, he looked into the camera during a 20-second timeout during a game last year and said: "Hey kids - do drugs." Wow. Thanks Scot. That's hilarious. That might be his best contribution to the NBA other than the beard. And the chops.

Chris Kaman - WOW. This picture says it all. WOW.










Coach - Stan Van Gundy - Van Gundy makes this list based solely on his resemblance to Ron Jeremy. The fact that both have apparently been very successful in their respective professions is interesting, considering that their looks should hinder them greatly. Not to say that an NBA coach needs to be good looking, but no one wants to play for an ugly coach.

Honorable Mention - Trent Plaisted (he makes the list without having played an NBA game - impressive), Andrew Bogut, Steve Nash (due mostly to his stupid haircut), Dirk Nowitski, Dikembe Mutombo and Andrei Kirilienko a.k.a. Ivan Drago.

Re: Basketball Tonight

Boyd’s recent contribution got me thinking about the guys we play ball with. I can’t stand the guy who can barely dunk but thinks he’s Vince and spends the entire time between games throwing himself the bounce lob or having someone throw him an oop. I need to give love to the guy with goggles and braces on both knees. I’m the guy who gets ticked off when someone doesn’t call out a pick and I get blown up by someone Boyd’s size. I’m also the guy who loves to play with guys like Boyd, because when he walks into the gym people assume he sucks if they haven’t seen him play. I love that, even though he kind of does suck. PlayBoyd would have you believe that his range starts when he enters the gym… Anyhow, when discussing the guys we play ball with, Boyd didn’t mention my favorite guy—the one who never shuts up. You know, the guy who talks like Gary Payton but plays like a male cheerleader. I have a story to illustrate my point.

I’ve got to give it up to my boy Dyer on this. He never shuts up. Ever. A few years ago we played together in an AAU league and we were going up against the league’s leading scorer. Dyer suggested that he guard the guy, and right from the tip Dyer is in this guy’s ear. Dyer is telling the guy all about how it will be shackles and handcuffs all game long and that there is a distinct possibility that the guy might go scoreless on the night. The guy just laughed him off and proceeded to gun. You know how talking smack to some guys makes them play worse? Well, not this guy. He’s hitting threes all over the court and Dyer still won’t shut up. So, in the early fourth quarter the guy hits a three to give him 41 for the game and he looks at Dyer and asks: “How many do I have to hit to get you to shut up?” Apparently a few more, because even though the guy was really giving him the business, Dyer wouldn’t stop talking. The guy ended up with 53 points for the game with 13 three pointers. It was awesome. Some people just don’t know when to quit…

If Dyer didn’t know when to quit, my boy Alan Webb was on a completely different level. Webb, Dyer and I were playing in a 3-on-3 tournament at the community college. Webb is 6-6 and the guy checking him was about 6 feet tall. The kid is jawing with Webb, so he starts jawing back. When Webb starts talking smack it’s like listening to a trucker or Andrew Dice Clay. It can get bad. The other team was fouling at the end of the game to try and stay in it and the kid fouled Webb to put him at the line. They were in each others faces and the rest of us had to separate them. A security guy was watching the game and he came over to the court to tell them to knock it off. Well, before the free throw, Webb looks at the kid and says: “This one is for your mom. She loves me.” He then knocks down the free throw as the kid goes berserk. The security guy promptly comes onto the court and tells Webb to knock it off, and Webb starts talking smack to the security guy. Well, security guy gets upset and gets in Webb’s face and eventually he physically drags Webb off of the court. He then handcuffs him on the sidelines and drags him out of the building.

We had never had a teammate get arrested before, so we didn’t know what to do – we ended up finishing the game 2-on-3. After the game we went outside and Webb is sitting out there on the sidewalk. He asks if we brought his gym bag out. I had it so I gave it to him and we headed to the car. Webb said: “I’m glad they didn’t go through my bag—they would have found my dime sack.” And he promptly whipped out a bag of weed.

Boyd talking about the goofballs we play ball with made me think of these guys and how amazing they are. Sometimes I miss the good old days.