First off, if you haven’t read PlayBoyd’s thoughts on Ron Artest, you should—it’s a great read. I had a great day yesterday. I don’t know if any news could have gotten me more frisky than when my boy Dyer called me. I answered and he said, “Are you excited that Manny is a Dodger?” I hadn’t heard and I almost ran my car into the cow pasture I happened to be driving by. This was the best sports news I’ve had in a while. Even though they might be the most frustrating team in baseball, I have always been a Dodgers fan. They have the money to spend big, but they don’t. And if they ever do spend big they do it on players who aren’t worth the money or who get injured within a month of coming to the team (i.e., Jason Schmidt). But now a ray of hope has shown upon Dodger nation in the form of a dreadlocked Man-Ram.
I love Manny. Love him. He can probably compete with Artest in the crazy as hell department, but I love that too. Finally the Dodgers are interesting again. Manny slaps teammates (just wait until he gets with Jeff Kent), plays as cutoff man even though he’s in left field, rolls over the ball to get in better position to make a throw, talks on his cell during pitching changes, knocks down 62-year-old men, holds up the game to go into the green monster to take a leak, and high fives fans while he’s making a play. Manny has been known to wear sunglasses with a built in MP3 player while playing left. Some of Manny’s antics are heartwarming in a Bad News Bears kind of way - and now he’s a Dodger. Terrell Owens once said, “I love me some me.” Well, I love me some Manny.
During a rehab stint a few years ago Manny lost his $15,000 diamond earring while sliding into third base. The grounds crew had to comb the infield looking for it. Man-Ram put a “Manny Ramirez autographed BBQ grill” up for sale on ebay. And just recently, during a game with the
I don’t know that Manny will be a savior or if the Dodgers will have Manny for more than this year, but they aren’t paying his contract and Man-Ram will be a free agent after this season, so he’ll be looking to put up huge numbers to earn a fat new deal. The best part about this is the Dodgers can now stop parading Andruw Jones out to the plate when he’s hitting .163 with 2 homers (another bad $ spending move by LA). Manny will have a big finish this year, help LA make the playoffs and become relevant, only to sign a fat contract with the Yankees or Mets or somebody else. The Dodgers can then put down big money on a player who will get hurt or never live up to the hype. Things will go back to normal soon enough, but for now I’m going to enjoy Manny disappearing from left field at Dodger stadium during pitching changes so he can pee. Manny was quoted on ESPN recently as saying “The Red Sox don’t deserve a player like me.” Amen, Man-Ram. Amen.