Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Thoughts ... from the Jockstrap?

I’m writing this at three in the morning because my three year old is afraid of the mythical barking dog that is in the dirt in our front yard – Yet another good reason for me to not like dogs. Since I’m really tired and have a swamped day tomorrow, I’m just going with some random thoughts for today.

I created a list of the ugliest players in the NBA a while back that got some good feedback. I considered making a list of the ugliest players in the NFL until I saw a picture of Marshawn Lynch. He is the list. This guy might be the ugliest athlete in sports. Is anyone close? Really? Sam Cassell is one ugly son of a b, but I don’t think he’s even in the same league as Lynch. Thank goodness football players wear helmets… Lynch is so ugly he makes Michael Jackson – the White version – look like an Adonis. Wow.

Does anyone feel more stupid this week than Sage Rosenfels (the QB of the Texans)? With four minutes left and the Texans up on the Colts (27-17) and trying to run out the clock, Sage went ahead and fumbled twice and threw an interception. Oh, and one of the fumbles was returned for a touchdown. Final – Colts 31, Texans 27. Nice job, Sage.

As a Dodgers fan, I can’t pass up the opportunity to point out that the Cubs played exactly three more games than the San Diego Padres. Congrats, Cubs fan.

College football is awesome – this isn’t as amazing as the stepping on a guy you’d get in the NFL, but this is good stuff.

Did you hear about the Wisconsin Band? They were unable to attend Saturday’s game against The Ohio State because they have been suspended indefinitely. This is the same band that was put on probation in 2006. What must a band do to be put on probation or suspended indefinitely? Apparently, all the alcohol use, hazing, and “sexualized behavior.” How awesome is that? The band is making news for a sex scandal. This is one of the greatest things I have ever heard. Seriously. Now, I’m not saying that if you were in the school band that you were a dork, but the odds are pretty freaking good (please don't get all bent out of shape at that comment if you were in the band - I'm sure you are awesome). Have you seen most of the people in the school band? I’m guessing most of them are still in the V club for a good reason. What do they say to each other – “Hey, that uniform looks great on you, wanna go have sex?” This story is almost too good to be true…

Speaking of college football, I went to the BYU-Utah State game on Friday night. I recently posted a column about the different types of fans I have had the pleasure of encountering (I can’t believe I forgot to mention the statistician). After writing that, I decided to pay particular attention to which of those types of fans I saw at the game. Well, I saw most of them. I saw eye candy (not in the same league as at UCLA), the embarrassment (some for each team), the coach, the premature withdrawal, superior to the ref, and several attention seekers. I mention this only to confirm my earlier assessment and state that it may warrant further attention in the near future.


Rich said...

Ummm yeah, I was in the band T-bone but not offended. Suffice it to say that I got all the...well you know.
Secondly I wasn't at the game so how did you see "eye candy"?